Skip to Content

The Best “Big Sister” Advice You’ll Ever Hear

The Best “Big Sister” Advice You’ll Ever Hear

When you’re the oldest sister, you tend to do everything to keep your siblings safe. You don’t want your younger sisters to go through the same problems you experienced simply because you didn’t have someone to hold your hand through it. 

That is exactly why I’m here today to share some of my “big sister” advice. I believe that there are a few things you shouldn’t go through in life just to learn a lesson. You can figure them out without experiencing the pain of the situation itself. 

So, for those girls who don’t have a big sister; for those who are the big sisters and never had someone to hold their hands, and for those whose big sisters never thought about teaching them these things – this one is for you! 

1. Stop sabotaging yourself

The Best "Big Sister" Advice You'll Ever Hear

Can you imagine how you’d live your life if you didn’t constantly make yourself trip over your own feet? Could you even fathom a life where you didn’t minimize your achievements and actually allowed yourself to be happy? 

I can promise you that this is a possibility; all you need to do is to stop sabotaging yourself. Stop standing in your way when you’re trying to reach that next goal. 

For example, take that job opportunity even if you don’t feel adequate for it. Go to that class that you feel like you’re too old to attend. Go on that date even though you feel like you’re not enough for someone to love you. 

Don’t sabotage yourself even though you feel like it’s the only way to keep yourself from failure. If you don’t fail, how will you be able to celebrate your success? 

2. Stop “making decisions” for other people

All of us do that, don’t we? A “big sister” piece of advice I can give you is to stop trying to read the mind of others and to stop making decisions for other people. 

What I’m talking about are all those times when you didn’t want to go out because you thought that you were nothing but a burden to your friends. Or all those times when you didn’t want to give a guy a chance because you thought that you weren’t interesting enough for him. 

Why would you make those decisions for other people? You’re not able to read their minds nor is your perspective of yourself valid because you don’t know what they see when they look at you. 

If someone wants to hang out with you, don’t automatically assume the worst. Stop believing that those people are just in your life out of pity for you. 

You’re an amazing person. You’re smart, interesting, and funny; you have great stories to tell and you always have a unique perspective on things. People should be delighted to talk to you and spend time with you. Never underestimate that. 

3. Sisters before misters

Boyfriends come and go. Never, under any circumstances, should you throw away your friends for a guy. 

I have been guilty of doing this, too. I would fall head over heels for a guy, so I was always there when he called. This would even include times when I already had plans with my girlfriends. 

Let me just tell you that this will haunt you later in life. You’ll remember all those beautiful friendships that you let go of because of some stupid guy that was there for a fleeting moment of your life. Just stop it. 

Of course, there are exceptions to this rule. Some friends will show their true colors when you’re not always available to them. They won’t care that you’re trying to find a balance between loving your boyfriend and loving them. 

However, you shouldn’t be delusional. Don’t just think that your friend is jealous of you because she told you that you’ve changed. She’ll tell you that you’ve been avoiding her since you found a boyfriend and that’s when you’ll become extremely defensive. 

Don’t be naive. It’s always “sisters before misters.”

4. Don’t take things too seriously 

The Best "Big Sister" Advice You'll Ever Hear

If you take one piece of advice from this list, please let it be this one. Life is too short to take things seriously. If you continuously try to understand what’s happening around you and why some things are the way they are, you’ll just go insane. 

There will always be people who will try to tear you down – laugh it off. What’s yours will always find its way to you, even if it doesn’t seem like that sometimes. 

Your anxiety will make you believe that everything is going wrong and that there’s no light at the end of the tunnel, but stop listening to it. Stop listening to your brain when it’s being mean to you. Are your thoughts even realistic or are you just making up scenarios? 

I know that it’s not always this easy to make those ideas go away, but I can promise you that life isn’t that serious. We like to believe that our problems are the root of everything, but they’re not. The roots that you plant will be the place where you grow. 

Eat that chocolate. Buy that coat. Pop that pimple. Go on that trip. Do it.

5. Let yourself get angry at people

We avoid anger because we’ve been told that it’s disrespectful. We’ve been told that anger is going to ruin the relationships we’ve created with other people. Sometimes, we’re not even able to process anger correctly so we often cry about it. 

But let me ask you something: would you still think like this if you thought of anger as your protector?

Your anger exists in order to put up your boundaries and to make people respect you. Whenever you feel disrespected, your anger comes out in order to protect you. Stop thinking of it as your enemy when it’s your biggest ally. 

It may be hard for you to express your anger when you first start letting yourself feel this emotion, but I can promise you that it’ll get better with time. 

What you should do is try to communicate these feelings with your friends, family, or your partner. Tell them what triggered these emotions and let them show you how much you mean to them. 

If they love and respect you, they’ll do everything in order to change their behavior and to make you feel good about your relationship again. If that doesn’t happen, then those people aren’t the right ones for you. 

Your anger is actually your best friend. Almost as good of a friend as your big sister is.